This Is What I Call Home

Jul 8, 2013

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Now, before we begin, first we need to go over a few orders of business:

  1. I have a new giveaway up with Sweet and Sour Vintage- enter HERE to win a $25 giftcard!
  2. Laura Whitman is the winner of my $50 Rust Belt Vintage giveaway! Yaaaay Laura! 
  3. Did you enter my Adelaide's giveaway yet? If you wanna be like Laura and knee-deep in new pinafores, get crackin and click over here.
  4. I'm posting over at Flock Together today! See how both me and Marisa of The Shades of Monet Chronicles styled the same dress here!

Now, back to our regularly scheduled programming:

I have an inept skill at choosing apartments that are *probably* moonlighting as underground meth labs. Seriously. Whenever I first move in I’m all like doing pirouettes through the lobby and thinking that the French elevators are charming, waving hello at the neighbors and feeling right at home. And then a week or two passes and the Hills Have Eyes people start coming out of the woodwork, and I find myself whittling a spear for self-defense in between commercial breaks.

Like what is this? In my last apartment building in Chicago, we had this little old lady that looked like a second cousin of some woodland necromancer that would just park herself in the lobby for hours and hang out. You’d come in and she’d eye you with her milky eyes and occasionally throw Kraft cheese slices on the floor to pass the time doing whatever it was that she was doing there. Occasionally we’d hold eye contact and I would swear that I heard the distant, creepily strained strings of an 18th century windup toy. And it appears that my luck has stayed the same in Seattle.
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I mean, I live in a nice neighborhood. Outside there are boys in plaid shirts and moms with strollers moseying around. You’d never guess what was tucked away in the basement floor of my building.

Maybe because they never venture out into the sunlight? 

One time I was throwing out the recycling, and when I turned around there was a lady that looked like her eyes were glued upside-down on her head- like a Mr. Potato Head that was messed around with. Using my recycle bin as a shield, I side-stepped outta there and tried not to break into a run for the stairs. Oh, my self control.
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Then there’s this other woman that I always see through my kitchen window: this smoker with pepper-gray hair up to her waist that likes to pace back and forth by the dumpster, letting her hair catch in the wind as she takes drags. She looks like she’s finagling spells while chain smoking in the shadows. And in the laundry room, there was a chatty fellow that seemed to only have a few important teeth in his mouth, and that’s about it. I saw him once at the grocery store after our encounter, and all that was in his basket was Stoli Vodka and a family-sized bag of Sour Patch Kids. 

Okay fine, that grocery list is pretty tight, but *still*.

It’s like these people have been licking the walls and it turned out there was lead in the paint. Lord, what if that lead is air-born? I soon won’t be needing that spear, I suppose…

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Also, how fun is this outfit? I love the light polka-dots paired with this floral vest- I literally cooed when I put it on in front of the mirror. And to avoid looking too much like a third grade art teacher, I added in some serious hardware in the form of a spike necklace. La-la-love!

Jean Pinafore- for sale in my shop HERE
Floral Vest- for sale in my shop HERE
Polka Dot Top- UO
Sandals- H&M
Necklace- won during a serious ebay battle

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  1. Hahaha, your descriptions of you neighbors...oh Marlen, you always make me laugh. I love it!
    Good luck with the lead ;)
    I love the fun mix of polka dots and florals. Plus, your statement necklace is right up my alley of statement wear haha

    Enter to win a Snoozer Loser pendant!
    Trendy Teal

  2. just love how you paired the two prints together! looks amazing :)

  3. Hii!
    woow, this outfit reminds me home too...

    I’m following your blog on GFC.

    Would you like to follow each other?

    I hope you’ll visit my blog too.


  4. Too cute! Love the hair cut on you more and more!

  5. LOL, there's so much gold in this post, that I can't even begin to describe. Basically, your entire first paragraph is one of the funniest things I've ever read (woodland necromancer LMFAO). I'm totally picturing something of the zombie variety inhabiting your apartment. I think you should curate more posts about bad apartment tales. This was such a delight to read! And you are always so innovative and creative with your outfits! I'm totally loving the addition of the floral vest on top of the denim, but love the long sleeves under as well :) Keep it up, you're a true fashionista!


  6. "like a third grade teacher.." hehehe. wonderful.

    Forgive me if I missed this somewhere, but are a writer, perchance? The way you communicate with the written word is fabulous. I always enjoy reading the commentary on your posts.

    The necklace is divine, by the way.


  7. Lol I hate to say it, but please live blog your descent into crazy town. While I feel for you, I'd rather hear your descriptions of your neighbors than not!
    Also "boys in plaid shirts." The epitome of suburban neighborhoods.


  8. Your whole post had me cracking up. I live in Koreatown in LA, and my building is full of crazies! It makes for good stories, but not for good neighbors. Haha.

    Also, that pinafore and vest are too cute. Like you.


    kelsey captivating

  9. You are too funny! I'm dying to see some pictures of your new place :). I love those sandals you're wearing, and I usually hate sandals!



    Southern (California) Belle

  10. The spiked necklace contrasts perfectly with this outfit! I love the mix of your tapestry vest and the polka dot blouse too. So cute!

    Holy crap I laughed at your description of the creepy city dwellers. Especially the one with her eyes glued on upside down. And the cheese thrower. Some people are just so strange and creepy and they're just more concentrated in cities!

    P.S. - After this summer trip up north I may be back around Christmas time. Then we can do some epic suburban thrifting if you're in town!

  11. cute look! i used to have a vest just like that and i wish i knew where it was now that i see it styled like this!

    ps-check out my James Jeans giveaway!

  12. Oh my! You should right a novel based on all your adventures in apartments.

  13. Cute layering! I love the floral vest, you just reminded me I own a vintage box purse with the same exact design, it look super cute mixed with denim. I'm taking notes, I'm about to move and have no idea of what to expect of my neighbours!

    Cee. ♥
    <a href="http://codeoverdressed.blogs

  14. Please write ten books. I cracked up reading this post and pestered my boyfriend with my exclamations over your descriptions of the creatures in and near your apartment.

  15. Super fun outfit :) I love your tapestry vest. And living in LA, I too encounter really strange people on a daily basis. Like, today I was at Trader Joe's and this woman had a cart full of alcohol and was just chanting throughout the store. Half the time I'm just like.. where do these people come from??

  16. That necklace is so rad. I'm so glad you were able to win it. :-)


  17. I love pinafore dresses at the moment. I have been wanting to get one myself. The patterns you combined it with are absolutely to love those intense ebay battles, right?

  18. I absolutely love what you're wearing in this post! x

  19. Oh you poor girl! This post had me laughing, but now I feel guilty. You have horrible luck with living situations! Who would have thought lower queen anne was so shitty :( I hope the lead isn't airborne!

  20. great texture in this outfit! i adore our necklace.
    "She looks like she’s finagling spells while chain smoking in the shadows." is my fave line. :)

  21. that necklace is serious business, i love it!

    & i thought i had the worst luck with neighbors. the worst of them all was this guy who i found urinating in the corner of my parking spot. LIKE, WHAT? on top of that he hung out by his truck EVERY night with very young kids. it was just. not. right. thankfully after the peeing incident i threw a super bitchfit at the apt. office and that guy got evicted. apparently he had several complaints against him. but man, that guy was the king of creeps i have encountered. apartment living!


  22. I love that vest! I love your hair! I love that necklace! Damn it, I love you! :D


  23. hahaha oh my GOSH, this sounds like an adventure! A pretty creepy one. I do like how you kept describing your defensive tactics, though... especially the spear whittling between commercial breaks and the trash can shield. Gotta take precauations, yeah? YOU STAY SAFE OUT THERE IN THAT DANGEROUS NEIGHBORHOOD OF YOURS. Though your experiences sound frightening, I must admit that they sure do make for some rad blog posts... ;)

    okay OUTFIT
    a)I still wanna steal your cool floral vest from you
    b) spiky geometric necklace yes yes good
    c) i don't actually have anything else to say I just like to make things in lists of 3 because it's a lucky number


  24. DUDE I HAVE SEEN AN UPSIDE DOWN EYES WOMAN BEFORE. This is a total riot. Vodka and sour patch guy clearly knows whats up, but what a shame he's too terrifying to party with.


  25. I am sooooo obsessed with your spiked necklace- congrats for winning the eBay battle! Those can get pretty hairy. I'm sorry to hear about your super weird neighbors.... If it makes you feel any better, there's a woman living on my block who owns 8 parrots. 8. And she leaves her windows open so we can all appreciate how loudly they scream!

    Xo, Hannah

  26. I would never think to combine these pieces together, but you totally pull it off! And you are actually hilarious, can't wait for your next post!


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