Pretty Dresses & Awkward Moments

Nov 14, 2012

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So a pretty dress and an awkward story for you guys. Oi, where to begin?

My mom came up to me yesterday with the most peculiar of suggestions.  Her tossing the idea at me was like the equivalent of being passed a hot potato right as the song starts speeding up. DIRE. DANGER.

But I’m a third-division Potato Champion, so luckily I handled it.

She came up to me when I was digging around the kitchen for some Fruit Loops and, leaning against the island, went ‘So me and dad are going to a party Saturday and we won’t be home till late… if you want to invite your boyfriend over.’

I straightened and blinked at her. Oh….kay.  Your mom scheduling your hook up sessions is weird, but my Polish, God-fearing fire-and-brim stone mother organizing them is even weirder. 

Like, she was a Quaker reverend in a past life, promising people ghouls will eat their children if they don’t repent their sins.  And she was definitely Jesus himself in a past-er life.  So you can see why I was so perplexed.

Where was a Twix when you needed one? Instead of answering and having the potato detonate in my face, I suspiciously shifted my eyes to the side and let loose a neutral ‘uuhhmm’.

I let it just hang there. She didn’t bite, so I decided to tread lightly and keep eye contact with the tiles on the floor instead. ‘Yea, that sounds…nice. Maybe we can like have a…puzzle night?’ Oh God help me, I hope she doesn't think that was code for something kinky. I whipped my head back up alarmed, and was half expecting to see her reaching for a wooden spoon to smack some purity back into me with.

But it worked. Instead she nodded and answered in her rolling accent, ‘Yeah, your bruther just bought board gajms, and I can order you kids some pizza and…’

THERE it is. I knew it was something G-rated. This is my mother we’re talking about- she thinks my marriage bed is going to be separate bunk beds. And course I agreed. Free pizza ya’ll.

Dress- vintage (how cute is the tiny turtleneck?)


  1. Stunning! so pretty, perfect dress for fall!

  2. This made me laugh! Your mom sounds nice haha. I think moms in general are prone to creating awkward moments.
    Your dress is super cute too! I love the muted colors and how you paired it with those grey tights :)


  3. Amazing dress!
    U look so lovely in it! Amaaazing!

    Christina Klein

  4. Haha to funny! Love the story. I also love those booties!
    Almost Endearing

  5. hahaha! You are hilarious. This is such a great post. :) And I LOVE this outfit!

  6. God, I love your writing. And awkward stories are the best make for some of the simplest entertainment.
    My mother is the saaaaaaame way.

  7. LOL! If my mom said that to me I probably would have totally taken it the wrong way like, "Yeah, maybe I should also get candles and wine..." then my mom would be like, "omg". Haha. I tell me mom things she would rather not year sometimes, LOL. Love the dress BTW.

  8. haha loved the story!
    and this dress is phenomenal! I love this color palette on you and with red hair everything looks so perfect ;)

  9. This is the best story! I understand completely though, sometimes you just wish you were in a Twix commercial and that one would appear out of thin air to save the situation. Ahh life!
    Much love,
    P.S. Love the dress!

  10. Your story made me laugh! And indeed that small turtleneck is adorable. The dress is so cute I love this look :)

  11. I'm living at home too right now and can understand the strange circumstances that sometimes brings (though, thankfully, my parents are not of the Quaker nor fire and Brimstone persuasion.)

    You sweater dress is so cute! I was just wondering what it would look like by itself (without a skirt over it, I mean!)

  12. Hahaha just a little awkward. Funny, usually parents say no boyfriend over when they are gone!

  13. that is so cute. both the story and the dress. sounds like your mom is maybe progressing a little? just hide the wooden spoons for when she gets home ; )

  14. Adorable dress, adorable story! Ahh I remember those days. There was no door shutting, no lights off, no funny business! Haha ;)

  15. this is one cute dress - and i'm in love with the grey color palette on you. and those boots! ugh loving it. and that's hilarious! nice though that your mom is understanding if a bit awkward but that kind of stuff always is with parents even when married and free pizza is the best

    <3 katherine
    of corgis and cocktails

  16. Well first of all, I love the shirt and mustard tights from your most recent post. I have the same ones and last time I wore them my boyfriend told me I looked like a McDonalds ad.. hmmm.
    Anyway this story pretty much made my life. I read it last night right before I left work, its my favorite of yours so far. PUZZLE NIGHT FOR THE WIN!
    And Also, this little dress is so cute!
    xo Hannah

  17. Hahaha... love this story! My parents are super conservative too, so I'm pretty sure they assume that my boyfriend and I play board games during all of our spare time ;) Love that dress- the print is great and looks so cozy for winter!


  18. I may have teared up a bit when I saw this dress, because I can't have one like it.

  19. Oh man have I been there. You handled it like a champ, ad yay for free pizza. Cute outfit.

  20. omg your mom scheduling your hook up sessions, that is THE best awkward story ever!! & the Quaker and then Jesus in her past lives gave me a chuckle too. Hurrah for free pizza! Oh and that reminds me of a friend in high school, her mom came home early and sneaked in through the back door because she knew she'd catch her & her bf making out on the couch. but I suppose the weirdest part of that is why a parent would want to see that... anywhoo that dress is so pretty & looks amazing on you!


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